Giving and Receiving Feedback

Learn practical tips in 3-4 minutes

Whether you are on the giving or receiving end of feedback, it's something most of us don't relish. We're all human. 

And being human also helps us. So you probably won't be surprised to learn that identifying your most noble motives, cultivating curiosity, and determinedly expecting the best of others is a strong foundation from which to have these sometimes-difficult conversations.

We all want to feel good about ourselves even in light of the message, whether we are the giver or receiver.

Check out my videos below with practical tips based on actual experiences, to help you prepare and manage some of the most common scenarios, respectfully and constructively.


Say the Most Important Thing First

It kind of gets your attention when an employee tells you, "I think you think I'm an idiot." 

See my video where I elaborate on what it might sound like to "Say the most important thing first" when facing a difficult discussion. I advocate planning, planning, planning, AND practice!

When You Want Them to Hear You, Stop Talking

Mayyyybe you’ve heard of the One-Minute Manager, but I’m pretty sure you’ve never heard of the 18-minute Manager. Rest assured. You don’t want to be one. 

“Mary, if I could just find a way for them to understand…”

It’s so easy to go on and on when trying to deliver important feedback. Why do we do this when it’s a good idea to listen instead? Learn more from my personal experiences in this video, that includes key tips to "stop talking" and improve your chances you’ll be heard.

Leave Them With Hope and Action

Do you like giving feedback when you think the person will respond badly? Probably not. Then you won't be surprised to learn that more than a third (37%) of America’s business leaders surveyed feel the same. Yet... you can get good at this. Your confidence grows. And your employee may actually appreciate your approach. After all, providing the right feedback for the right reasons, in a timely manner, with the most noble of intentions is the right thing to do.

One Tip to Avoid Being Baited in Important Conversations

Employee feedback. It's natural for us humans to deflect unwanted feedback. Deflecting (I call it "baiting") can show up in a myriad of ways. We as feedback deliver-ers sometimes expect the worst and avoid the discussion altogether. It doesn't have to be that way.

Learn from my personal experience. See my video on managing baiting (or whatever your conversation partner does to distract from the topic at hand) and a tactic to help you respond confidently and advance the discussion productively.

How to Receive Feedback "Inexpertly Delivered"

You've probably been there. I know I have. It can be disconcerting to receive feedback that is unclear, or you don't know where it's coming from. 

In this video you'll find 3 tips to help you navigate receiving feedback "inexpertly delivered" so you can maintain your composure and transform the discussion into something constructive.